The day North Korea banned poetry
A poem for Kim Jong Un
James Franco shed a tear, smearing the letter “q”
in his stern letter to Kim Jong Un.
Of course Franco writes his letters by hand,
by candle light if possible,
with a quill feather pen and ink well,
his fingers stained purple,
as if he has been eating plums.
He sends his letters by carrier pigeon.
Then he puts his penis in a paper sack
and writes “Not Fucking Any More”
on the bag with a sharpie.
Only men who have been raped
will get the joke. In his letter, James says,
“I once saved the world while high
and wearing a shirt that hadn’t been washed
for at least seven days. I made Eddie Murphy
laugh, so your laws have no power over me.”
North Korea banned laughter,
along with dioramas of dictators
dressed in drag. This put Russell Brand
out of business, so he started making t-shirts
asking for revolution. Franco tweeted his support,
which Seth Abramson re-tweeted,
and then someone wrote a think piece
on the significance of paperless billing.
Everything is connected because everything
is made of atoms that bond or don’t bond
and at that level of existence James Bond
has his license to kill revoked.
My collection of atoms wants to bond
with your collection, and that means
I want to fuck you. Isn’t that what life
is all about, until North Korea bans fucking,
and then James Franco stops writing
poems, which is what North Korea really wants
because metamodernism is a terrible joke
that people only pretend to get.