Member-only story
The Bad Art Friend Strikes Again
Kidney donation plagiarism was only the beginning
Jeff Spritzer didn’t know what to expect when his friend won a prestigious award for her story “The Donor.” But when he read it he was in for one heck of a surprise. Turns out, his friend Monica Pusswaggle had completely stolen his personal account of being a sperm donor.
Jeff felt hurt and betrayed. After receiving his MFA from the Acme Bubble Gum University, he had had trouble finding a deeper meaning in his life. He felt like true altruism was an ideal fading from the world, this world of mask-holes and conspiracy theorists and climate change denial. He shared much of these concerns with his online writing group, many of whom had come from the same MFA program.
“I just felt like there was something I needed to do to give some good back to the world. I needed to do something truly selfless. That’s when I had the idea to become a sperm donor.”
He had remembered seeing an article in The New Yorker that discussed people’s struggles with conception, and how overall fertility rates were on the decline, causing a reversal in population growth for the first time in recorded history.
“I knew my sperm was good sperm. I had gotten three women pregnant already in my life, and paid for their abortions out of my own…
