Member-only story
Guard Dogs of Loose Change
How choices turn into careers and wasted time
I am a human guard dog. The difference is I guard the junkyard, before it becomes the junkyard. A corporation pays me to protect their bottom line. I’m basically an undercover security guard for a big box retailer. And this, is what I attempt to call a life.
It's been 23 years now. Over half my adult life spent walking in circles around temples built to the worship of capitalism. I shew away the would-be parasites, pretending that I myself am not a parasite, just clinging to the flesh of the corporate behemoth. I send those who will not be deterred to see how well silver bracelets fit on their wrists. Not the comfortable or the beautiful kind. The kind that come with their own set of consequences.
This was not started with the intention of building a career. Could you even call this a career? I started down this path believing it was a temporary means to an end. Just a part time gig to help me get my education. But like most things, plans are what end up in the ashes of fires, especially when the person making the plans has to often sell off their belongings to pay the phone bill, while ignoring the collection agency calls from the offices of his student loans.
College didn't pan out. Because I'm a lazy fuck. So here we are. 23 years later. At least I read some good books.
Maybe I was always destined to do this. I couldn't tell you the number of times my mother said over the years, "Two things I hate in this world: liars and thieves." Somewhere along the line, I started saying it too, believing it carried a kind of righteous truth. I never realized growing up that truth generally depends on the angle from which it's viewed. Given enough time, everyone eventually becomes a liar and a thief, it just depends on the circumstances, a matter of degrees.
The other indication that I was born to do this seemed prophetic in its unfolding. On my way back to my dorm, coming from a night of tomfoolery at a friend’s place, I ran into two drunk guys who were in desperate need of a ride. Wanting to do a good deed, I reluctantly agreed to give them this ride. It was a short trip, and I had nothing but time. This incident seemed to transpire without much to speak of. Little did I know.
